Do You Serve From Your Cup or Your Overflow?

If you haven’t noticed by now, for the last few weeks, I’ve begun sharing Moms ‘N Charge TOTD (tip(s) of the day) on my Facebook fan page. Earlier this week, I shared a tip that I learned from the amazingly inspirational and motivational expert, Lisa Nichols. Click here if you missed that post (and then be sure to check back daily for more TOTD *wink*).

I received feedback both online and offline from moms surrounding this topic, so I wanted to go a little more in depth with this post because it’s such an important topic. It’s something that most of us battle with. But it all goes back to my Super Fresh Tips on Feeling GOOD without Feeling GUILTY. When we don’t take care of our own personal needs, then everyone around us suffers. I don’t know about you, but when I haven’t had enough sleep, enough to eat, or time to myself to unwind, I can be more than a little unpleasant to all those around me. Unfortunately, my husband and kids take the brunt of it. It’s not cute. And I don’t like that person that I’ve seen myself become.

So when I attended Doreen Rainey’s GET Radical Women’s Conference earlier this year, and heard Lisa speak about learning how to serve from your overflow, it definitely shed a whole new light on how to take care of myself. It reiterated to me the importance of learning how to say “no”, even if it means having to disappoint others. It means that sometimes it’s ok to be selfish. Sometimes we have to be selfish in order to protect our own well-being. Because if we don’t protect and take care of our own mental and physical state, then no one else will. But Lisa can explain it way better than I can, so here is a clip in which she explains the importance of serving from your overflow and NOT from your cup.


One thing I realized I needed to do was to rearrange the way I added to my everyday calendar. There was never any free time on the weekends because I accepted every invitation that came my way (whether it was personal or business). So one change that I committed to right after that conference, was blocking off one weekend a month. Whether I use that time to catch up on my favorite tv show, take the kids out somewhere, or just stay in my PJ’s, I know that I have that time set aside to just rejuvenate, and refill my cup.

So what small change can you commit to that will allow you to have a cup that continues to overflow?

*This post contains affiliate links. All views and opinions are of my own.*


Interested in using the content in this article for your website or blog? Please feel free to do so as long as you include the following: “Christine St.Vil is the Founder & CEO of Moms ‘N Charge – Helping moms feel GOOD without feeling GUILTY! Get her FREE report & Super Fresh Tips by going to:

© Christine St.Vil and Moms ‘N Charge 2012.

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  • MELISASource
    November 11, 2012 at 10:55 PM

    Wow…you just reminded me of how I used to do that: I used to block 1 weekend a month to unplug and for family time, but then I stopped somewhere. That is really something that i need to get back to doing!! Thanks for sharing!

    • Christine St.Vil
      November 12, 2012 at 5:05 PM

      Hi Melisa, thanks for your feedback and that is just confirmation for me as well that it’s a good idea to stick to. This past weekend it felt good to do.absolutely.nothing. 🙂

  • Nae
    November 12, 2012 at 9:09 PM

    I’m not a mom but I definitely have an issue with scheduling. I like the idea of blocking out an weekend a month..I’m sure my fiance would too 😉

    • Christine St.Vil
      November 13, 2012 at 7:44 AM

      Hi Nae! Well you will definitely be way ahead of the game once you do have kids. 🙂 It will make your transition that much smoother if you start ahead of time. Thanks for sharing!

  • Mary
    November 12, 2012 at 11:21 PM

    Important reminder for sure and indeed very true when one is rested and happy one shares from the overflowing abundance of joy and rest and when that isn’t the case one shares from the overflow of ugly…

    • Christine St.Vil
      November 13, 2012 at 7:45 AM

      Thanks Mary! I completely agree with you. I know I am definitely a MUCH happier and pleasant person when I’ve had time to relax. 🙂

  • Brandi
    November 13, 2012 at 12:24 AM

    Thank you for sharing a practical way to actually learn to take the time for ourselves. I like your idea of blocking off time every month. This is my “no” time. I love it!!

    • Christine St.Vil
      November 13, 2012 at 7:45 AM

      Thanks Brandi! It’s such a small thing but it makes such a HUGE difference in terms of maintaining my sanity. LOL 😉

  • Caroll
    November 13, 2012 at 3:53 AM


    This post is sooo timely! Also, my first inclination was to say that I should serve from my cup, what a revelation! I love this. I am going to take some serious note of this and make some much needed changes. Thanks for this excellent post!

    • Christine St.Vil
      November 13, 2012 at 7:46 AM

      Thanks so much Caroll! I completely agree with you and had the same inclination when I first heard Lisa share it at the conference back in March. It was a big eye opener for me, so I’m happy to pass along her awesome words of wisdom. 🙂

  • Kimberly Weathersby
    November 13, 2012 at 5:09 AM

    Great article. When you are the person that people know they can depend on, you are quickly overloaded with tasks and requests from others. I’ve learned that it is ok to say no, especially if these commitments are interfering with your own family life, health, or personal obligations.

    • Christine St.Vil
      November 13, 2012 at 7:48 AM

      That’s exactly right Kim! And saying no has been a big undertaking for me. But it’s so important to set these boundaries for ourselves, so thanks for sharing!

  • DjRelat7
    November 13, 2012 at 8:48 PM

    I am not married or a mom yet, but I have gotten this advice repeatedly. I have learned to start doing it now. For example, my boyfriend has a busy schedule; he is great at helping others. So I found myself keeping my self free for in case something canceled and we could spend time together. There was a brief period where I felt like all I was doing was waiting. This may not compare but I started making plans and when he was free because something canceled I was not available. I made myself not available, so he can see I value my time and my plans. Over time he started to see that and now I don’t have to make myself busy when I’m not. I do feel appreciated. And if I happen to have free time at the same time he does, GREAT. I feel better about it because I am giving him time from my overflow 🙂 Great perspective on taking care of yourself. Its true, if you don’t take care of you who will?

    • Christine St.Vil
      November 14, 2012 at 5:15 AM

      Hey DJ! Well you are definitely way ahead of the game! I wish I had paid more attention to my “me” time BEFORE I had kids so that it would’ve been like second nature once I had kids. Bad habits are hard to break so kudos to you for being two steps ahead and taking care of yourself now. 🙂

  • Kesha Brown
    November 14, 2012 at 8:09 PM

    Giiiirl, I used to work ALL the time with no planned time for extracurricular activities and when I did rarely watch some TV I felt guilty because I knew there was work that could be done.

    Fortunately, those days are long gone and I now plan time weekly for Pamper Me days, monthly massages, fun in my hobby (scrapbooking), watching TV/movies, and hanging out. I realized how much I missed it all!

    Awesome post and great reminder for others to take care of self first!


    • Christine St.Vil
      November 15, 2012 at 7:43 AM

      Hi Kesha, thank you so much for sharing! Your post just made me so happy because that’s what we should all strive for. That is so awesome you do your weekly Pamper Me days…I think that is what I will call mine. 🙂

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