Many times, when I talk to fellow moms in their 20s, they often tell me how tired they are and how they can never find enough time to do the things they use to do before having babies. They talk as if that woman they were before motherhood has up and disappeared as soon as her water broke. And far too often they have no idea how to get back to that woman, along with her passions, desires, vibrancy and confidence.
Here are 5 ways that I have personally used on myself and taught my clients on to re-connect with that “woman” and keep her around for good while balancing motherhood as a millennial woman:
1. Create a calendar system with specific time slots for the things you love each week.
By using a calendar system like google calendar, you have a better chance at planning your week out in advance and seeing where you can create time away from all the tasks of work, family and house upkeep and focus only on the thing you truly love to do. Let the entire family know that mommy also needs her own time and make it a non-negotiable each week, NO.MATTER.WHAT. By planning ahead and blocking ou, this time you have more of a reason to get the babysitter or help and get out of mommy-mode and into the mindset of just a young woman.
2. Start journalling & meditating… DAILY
When you start taking time out to reconnect with yourself and your own actual feelings (and not about what your child hated about his day or why he didn’t eat his lunch at school) you will start to uncover bits and pieces of the feelings, desires and thoughts that were buried under all the needs of your family and work commitments. Make it a habit to journal at the beginning or end of your day, even if it’s for 5 minutes only. Then take a few minutes and just sit still. It will get easier as you practice this art and the benefits will amaze you.
3. Re-read your old diaries or your favorite books when you were younger
I find that when you read the things that use to absorb your time as a teen/young adult, you start to also re-live the feelings you had and this can help with discovering what you desired to do with your life and what lights you up.
4. Delegate something you hate
If you find yourself constantly doing laundry or cleaning up after your little ones after work that you barely have enough time to shower and relax, it’s time that you delegate something or things. Look into the actual prices and services available. It might surprise you how cheap it is to hire a house cleaner for a few hours each week and how much time it will save you! Plus, how happy you will be to have someone helping you for once so that you can focus on things you enjoy doing!
5. Communicate often with other young moms in a high-vibe community
This is so important. If you have friends that are not very uplifting or too busy themselves to talk with, find new friends online! Facebook groups are perfect for this type of thing. Find a group of like-minded mommies to share you dreams, desires and thoughts with. You will love the support and sense of community you feel.
Always remember that the only way you can give the best you to your family and career is to give to yourself first. Take care of the young woman inside!
What is the best way you like to reconnect with the woman you were before parenthood?