5 Reasons You Need to Let Go of Single Mom Shame

Single mom shame

Hi my name is DiSheen and I am a single mom. It has been almost nine years since I gave birth to my last child. It has taken me every day of the past nine years to walk with my head held high and know that despite what I am labeled, the word mother should never be associated with the word shame. According to American society, single mothers and especially black single mothers are to blame for all the things that are wrong with children today and continually associated with outrageous scrutiny.

Here are five reasons you should drop the shame cast upon by other’s opinions and perceptions and live shamelessly.

Also Related: 5 Daily Prayers For Your Children

  1. Being a mom is the hardest job in the world period. Some of the struggles that you have are shared by all moms even if they have a partner or spouse in the home to help. So, struggles are just mom struggles.
  2. Love doesn’t come with a relationship status attached. You love your child. Your relationship status doesn’t determine if you love this person who grew inside of you for nine months and has brought you an indescribable joy that keeps even the best wordsmiths lost for words. Also, let them love you in spite of your imperfections because you are watered by their love too.
  3. Life is a series of choices along a long journey. No matter the situation surrounding the conception or birth of your child. That child was destined to be yours, so enjoy each moment because the next time you look up you’ll be holding your grandchild. Quit living in regret because living in the past will make you miss the joy in today.
  4. You can only be responsible for the child you were entrusted to raise. Stop reading all the articles, tweets, and comments that perpetually make the single mom out to be the spawn of all the troubles in American society. You can only be responsible for the child that you raise. Make sure they are equipped with all the tools that they need to be a great human being and leave God to fix everybody else.
  5. Greatness comes in many shapes and sizes. For some reason, we as people feel like greatness is limited to a certain group of people. However, that theory is constantly dispelled because many of the greatest people in the world are far from the “ideal” person or in the “ideal” situation when their greatness is manifested. What if Mary had not given birth to Jesus? Or if Stanley Ann Dunham had not birthed President Barack Obama?

Remember all mothers need help no matter if it comes from a partner, the in-laws, neighbors, or friends. Being a mother is such a desired opportunity that women are literally dying to give life no matter the how that life came to be. Don’t you take for granted a gift that someone is literally mortgaging their house to fund their fertility treatments or to pay their adoption fees. Single or married we are all in this together. Live Shamelessly!

Have you as a single mother ever felt shame over your status? If so what helps you get over that shame?

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  • Shantae Pelt
    May 14, 2016 at 3:22 PM

    Single Mothers are some of the most resilient women I know, myself included . Such a wonderful article . Thank you for sharing !

  • Keeya waldon
    May 16, 2016 at 6:57 AM

    Love this post! As a single mother we have a tough job and its not always easy but worth it. I love that we as single mothers are saying no to shame of being single and taking on the task of being the best parent we can be. We all need to stick together! Great read

  • Rita
    May 19, 2016 at 7:33 PM

    I loved this amazing article. I’ve been a single mom and at times still feel like one lol. Single moms need to know that their worth is incomparable. Many single moms have and still are raising awesome leaders.

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