Motherhood is everything you can imagine. It is rewarding and daunting. At times you can have tons of energy and other times your energy is drained. But out of all the emotions you can go through, the biggest feeling most parents can feel is the need to be the perfect parent. In the world of social media, you see parents who have everything perfect and in place. Their house is in tip top shape. Clean and organized. They have their kids activities on a planner and most of their kids are scholars. All A’s and knows more than those who are in college! Children are great in public. They are not throwing temper tantrums and always say please and thank you. It will make you feel insecure as a parent.
Those who feel like they need to be like the parents on social media I think should take a step back. The need to be the perfect parent is something we all go through. There are parents who do not have their house organized and they do not have their children in a million activities. Kids may be struggling in some subjects in school. Not all kids are the most well-behaved kids you see.
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The point is, we do not know what happens behind the scenes of the parents who paint a picture perfect life. We all can look great in pictures and create an image of a together family. There are plenty of parents who go through rough times with their children. Well behaved children can have a bad day. You may see the most well-behaved child throw a tantrum every now and again. Those busy activity plans can be hard to keep up. The parent can be exhausted but put up a brave face and keep up with the basketball season or dance class. Do you think the most organized house is clean 24/7? Don’t you realize some will make sure they have everything nice and clean just so they can take a picture? What about that scholar? Kids or anyone in that manner has to work extremely hard to keep their grades up. There may be a failed test here and there. Extra tutoring may be needed to keep the grades up. So now we can let go of the perfect parent theory.
There is no such thing as a perfect parent. We as parents can go through highs and lows. It is normal to have fears of not being the best parent you can be. What is not okay is comparing yourself to the parents on social media. You don’t know what goes on behind the perfect picture. Nothing is always perfect and not everything goes according to plan. We can paint the picture any way we want it to be. The most important thing is, how are we communicating with our children? Are we spending enough time with them? Are we having important conversations with them? It is one thing to take the perfect picture but it is another thing to be involved in their lives. At the end of the day, behind that picture should be happy kids who know that they are loved by their parents. We should instill in them love, structure, and responsibility. Even if the picture is not perfect, the love and discipline that they need will always be there long after the picture is taken.
Do you feel pressure to keep up appearances as a parent?
5 Comments
Kristen R. Harris
May 9, 2016 at 3:12 PMKeeya, this is so timely. Last week I was just having a conversation with a good friend because I saw a post something on FB that instantly made me feel like my daughter was not doing enough. Thank God for my friend who quickly reminded that we were doing great.
It is so easy to start playing the comparing game while on social media. Great post!
Keeya Waldon
May 9, 2016 at 3:51 PMThank you for reading! Trust me I often look on social media and feel like I an not doing enough as a mother. But I realized that I am doing the best as I can and not to look at pictures and assume anyone has it easy. We do not know what goes on behind the scenes of that household. As long as we are doing our part as a involved parent, that is all that should matter. So I can relate to how you are feeling!
Christine St.Vil
May 10, 2016 at 9:19 AMI love this post Keeya and completely agree. It’s so easy to feel like the worst parent cause you can’t make all those cute DIY crafts you see other moms make, or take your kids to activities and events all the time. So it’s important to keep things in perspective.
Keeya Waldon
May 10, 2016 at 11:31 AMThank you Christine!Many parents feel the need to compete with the mothers that they see in social media. It can make you feel like you are not doing enough because they are doing so much. It can leave you feeling like your best is not good enough. I found that when I stopped comparing myself to the mothers on social media, I was able to focus more on being the best parent I can be. So I found peace in the role that I am as a mother and no longer compare myself to other women. I am glad you enjoyed this post,
Jessica Hill
May 16, 2016 at 11:18 PMGreat post love!! I think we’ve all been at that place in our life a time or two!!